sometimes you just have to let it go
If you've ever visited Frank and I then you will know we are pretty house proud. We like our house, we like our stuff and it is possible we look after it to excess. When people visit we try and keep it all in check, but I guess making people remove their shoes at the door is a bit of a give away. That, and hovering over them with a cleaning cloth. And the obsessive neatness of everything.
OK, I'm exaggerating. A little. But at times I wonder if we love our stuff too much. And when people visit and point out the cleanness of everything I feel bad about our obsessiveness and the niceness of it all, but hey, we don't have children, we can keep things looking schmick and it works for us.
Recently our house pride was put to the test. A guest spilt tea on a beautiful, cream woollen rug. That rug is our pride and joy. (I exaggerate. A little) We like it a lot. It now has a dirty great tea stain which the carpet cleaner has warned us may be impossible to remove. A situation not helped by my well meaning, bicarb frenzied cleaning attack. (Although when you think about it, tea is tannin and tannins stain and dark stains show up best on light colours. Bicarb can hardly have made it worse)
It's been interesting to note Frank and my reaction to the situation. Not the cleaning attempts... but our emotional reaction. We've been really upset, out of sorts even. Almost grieving the loss of the rug. Crazy but true.
It's got me thinking about what has real value and worth. Yes, the rug definitely had value and worth - it was beautiful. But people matter more. And accidents happen - stuff gets wrecked. We loved having a house full of people the other day. Yeah, we're pretty sad about the stain, but friends are more important. Relationships are real and they have value it is difficult to quantify.
So. What price a rug? The price of choosing not to raise it when I saw the person again. Choosing not to be angry that they made no mention of the accident and didn't enquire as to the state of our rug... I let it go and forgave them in my heart.
I think Frank and I may have passed the test. (But no more tea spills please!)
posted by cecily @ 10:04 pm
4 comments
4 Comments:
Great things you are learning about yourself, Cecily. Isn't life an interesting ride?
You both make me proud to be your friend! We're perhaps a bit too obsessive too, but as we age we seem to love having our youngest tenants visit up here with the 'Old Man Upstairs'. That, more than any wisdom as you showed, has lessened our seeking perfection. We tend to just laugh off damage and keep valuables up high.
Our little guests range from several weeks to 7-8 yrs old. We also get the neighbors kids since they found out I love cartoons too. And good healthy snacks like plain popcorn, carrots, apples, etc.
You seem to have the proper balance between your 'things' and your friends. Remember, all those 'desirable' dings, stains, 'patinas', and other signs of use are considered to enhance the value of antiques in general.
Have you tried vinegar? Google vinegar and carpet cleaning. It's amazing stuff! ;-)
It's true. We fret about things that, in the end, don't really matter all that much.
It's not the friend's fault that they didn't realise the significance of the rug to you. As long as they realise the significance of your friendship, and the absolute value of that.
Hugs. xx
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